Wyld Creativity: The Greatest Asset A Girl Can Have.

Saturday, November 10, 2012

The Greatest Asset A Girl Can Have.

I think the above statement sums up the problems I have in a nut shell. For my entire life I knew exactly what I wanted and what makes me happy and the difficulties over the past 2 years have clouded the vision of where and who I want to be. I think it's SO vital that I figure this out. I have a vague idea, I mean I know WHERE I want to be is in a loving, joyful, happy, comfortable and peaceful place and what I am doing as long as I have those attributes as the outcome doesn't matter. I also know that WHO I want to be is a joyful, passionate, kind, driven person. I want to lead a life that reflects who God created me to be. I want to find my strength and zest for living through God alone.

I know what I want but I can't picture it happening in my world under current circumstances. I guess my vision is to be a free, joyful, passionately driven woman but the idea of what this looks like today is so skewed I can't picture it.

I understand that practical things will help move me in the right direction: Loosing weight, an advertising career, a better marriage, but the happiness that comes from within and the freedom that comes from the lord is there always, even in the less than glamorous job, access pounds and tough relationships. I want to KNOW that I CAN have that passion, free spirit even in the most dire circumstances and I am actually confused with myself right now because I don't understand how I could be so out of touch with the creative, joyful, free and passionate person I am.

I have read this statement OVER and OVER again..YOUR VISION OF WHERE AND WHO YOU WANT TO BE IS THE GREATEST ASSET YOU HAVE.

WHERE DO I WANT TO BE????? time to get literal.

I want to be in a cozy apartment or house, it doesn't have to be fancy..but I want to decorate it and make it homey. I want shelves for my movies since I Love to collect them, I want to hang my movie posters and have a little entertainment zone. I want to have the fridge stocked with yummy fruit, all the things I love. I want to play the guitar (I need help to learn!) I want to have savings, enough for a trip once a year and comfortable but not ridiculous living. I want to be working Full-Time in a job that I love, something that allows me to use my creativity and brighten up peoples day. I want to have a family and be a mom, I want to sing on the worship team and go to bible studies- On that note I want to be involved in what happens, I have ideas for dramas, creative ways to reach people and I want to be part of the team that is out there doing it!

I want to have a close group of girl friends and continue to be close to my family. I want to share all this with someone. I want to let loose, be happy and know that I am loved to the CORE, no matter what I do, what happens or how much I suck somedays. I want to be comfrotable in my life and not feel bad that I haven't pushed hard enough to be the best version of me. I just want to be anywhere where all of these things can happen. I don't even like saying them out loud because it seems like I am asking too much but I am just throwing it out there because as the quote says...KNOWING WHERE AND WHO I WANT TO BE IS THE GREATEST ASSEST I HAVE!

So WHO DO I WANT TO BE????

Passionate

Joyful

Forgiving

Strong

Loving

Radical Christ Follower

Peaceful

Witty

Creative

Beautiful

Confident

FREE

Content

Spiritual

Driven

Enough

Worship Filled

Honest

Kind

Humble

Giving

A Go Getter-Take No Prisoners Kind of Girl.

This list does help put things into perspective. It's important to look at life and challenge ourselves to work and make an effort to get what we want BUT... do I want an advertising career or is what I really want, a life like what I mentioned above and the characteristics I listed? I know the answer to that and I have been going about my life trying to force a version of it that i don't even get anymore. I know it's more complicated than that but I know I can be where and who I want to be without it being the complicated mess it is.

I am imagining the vision in my mind..freedom + joy + passion + me ...

Its so simple

Yet so so complicated.

I am not willing to give up though and I know as hard as it is I have to find a way to get back to this and create it for myself with the circumstances I am in right now.

After talking about it, I don't know if I understand anything better but I do know that where and who I want to be isn't complicated and not anything I should compromise on. It's all about finding a happy balance I guess.

Those are my Saturday night thoughts for now..

I am going to keep working on getting to the bottom of where I stand with that quote.

Until Next Time!

2 comments:

Heidi said...: Heather - that is awesome. I want that for you too. I pray you would have the desire to dive into God and find yourself through his lens. He sees you exactly as you are to be. Love you tons
Heidi; November 11, 2012 at 3:34 PM
Anonymous said...: I hear your heart Heather, and God does too. Soak in His presence and let Him love you and show you all that He has made you to be.
Love
Mom; November 14, 2012 at 11:19 AM

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The Story of a Prince and a Girl who Dreamed of finding Her Prince.

Once upon a time there was a young woman named Ruby; she lived in a far way kingdom where only the stars in the sky could light the way. The kingdom was tall and made of stone. Inside, it had all of the finest linens and tapestries with winding stair cases, golden mirrors and exotic flowers that stretched the kingdom’s stone walls. The kingdom was surrounded by a large creek bed and had a large wooden draw bridge outside the tall black iron front gates. Beyond the kingdom were many forests, pastures, rivers and hills.

The young woman lived in the kingdom with only her two servants Nigel and Jasmine. They had been with Ruby ever since her mother gave birth to her and have cared for her and loved her since the great royal war that took her family tragically away from her. Years had past since then and Ruby was a young woman now. Since the great royal war she had not seen another person beside her servants. The lands had been deserted as other kingdoms were destroyed and abandoned. No one knew this kingdom existed. It stood in a far off place that only one deserted over grown pathway in the forest would lead to.

Ruby spent her childhood growing up playing with all the animals in the forest, she had names for all of them and would spend her days dancing in the pastures and walking along the creek bed throwing stones into the water. She was content those days as she lived free and enjoyed every tree, every stone, and every pathway near the kingdom. She loved her home but she missed her family and many times she felt alone.

As Ruby grew older she began to stop playing in the pastures and instead she spent her days walking along the creek bed dreaming of finding love and not being alone anymore. Every night outside her balcony she would spend time looking out into the stars and making wishes that one day soon a wonderful man would find the unmarked path in the forest that would lead him to her kingdom.

Nigel and Jasmine were very old now; Ruby took time to care for them and tended to their needs. She would gather food from the garden and make them food to eat and get them blankets to make sure they were comfortable when it was cold. She was not sure how much longer they would live but one thing she knew was how much she admired they’re love for one another and she hold that in her heart for as long as she lived.

It was a warm fall evening; the leaves from the trees were lightly falling as the sun began to set. Ruby was standing on her balcony in her long white silk night gown. As the dark sky began to shine, a light breeze bustled against her gown and her long brown hair blew lightly in the wind. She stood with her hands on the balcony ledge and wished to the stars like she had so many nights before singing” Star light Star bright bring my prince home to me tonight” She stared up into the dark blue sky and began to talk more to the shinning stars.

Just as she was looking up into the sky, talking to the stars a man was following the pathway from the forest that leads to Ruby’s kingdom. He was beginning to approach the edge of the pathway he had began journeying on earlier that day and was about to step on to a beautiful white shiny stoned pebble walk way that would lead up to a draw bridge and to Ruby’s kingdom.

The young man had been travelling for months only eating what he could find along the pathway. Henry was a prince from the golden city of Persia. He was on an expedition when he was captured by rivals and taken to a far away land where he was imprisoned in a place he did not know. Months ago after many nights planning Henry escaped while the guards were sleeping. He thought he would be able to journey home by recognizing land marks but once he had fled the guards he realized that he was further from home then he ever imagined and much to his dismay he did not recognize any of his surroundings. He had been following the sun in hopes of finding his way home. Each day he walked further hoping that one day the pathway would lead him to his family.

Earlier that day Henry had been walking though the forest with large green bushes and fruitful trees around him when he saw a small unmarked pathway that was ragged and old. There were no fruit trees, only old tall trees and an old pebble pathway that seemed run down and abandoned.

He was going to continue to walk on the pathway he had been but something caught his eye as he walked past this abandoned trail. Henry saw a small red ruby attached to a ring lying in between some wet leaves. The sun was shining on it and it glistened and shinned at him. He bent down and lifted the leaves around it away and dusted the ring off and looked at. The ring was prestigious and fit for a princess. He thought about continuing on the main pathway road through the forest but he was drawn down this unmarked pathway. He wondered if this ruby red ring belonged to someone. He put the ring in his pocket and began to walk along the jagged unmarked pathway. He noticed that there were no markings along this pathway so it appeared that no one had walked this pathway for many years.

To Be Continued…

Wyld Creativity

Overcome.

Saturday, November 10, 2012

The Greatest Asset A Girl Can Have.

2 comments:

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